Right, I know that even boxing day is over already but I still wanna write about Christmas. I'm supposed to wake up at 9am to get ready to go to boulevard, cause I need to find a box for Bie's present, I lay in bed until 1 something in the afternoon. Then I got up and went with mom, both of us with empty stomach. we walk around the clothes department to let mom have her time since she is always trapped at home. I wanted to get something for myself too but somehow I could not concentrate because I kept worrying about the box and checking the time and also wondering if I could spend my Christmas with him or just accept my friends' invite to a movie instead. Yes! Too much on my mind to actually worry about clothes! First time ever to actually pay serious attention to Christmas although I've always like Christmas. I'm giving my Bie a handmade present for the first time, THIS IS SERIOUS BUSINESS I TELL YOU!! Cause I'm actually kinda useless so I can't really cook stuff and is actually not rich enough to buy him stuff to please him like what other GFs would do, so on a special occasion like this I wanted to make something I put lots of effort in for him. So I finally left the clothes department after mom sense my lack of patience and me being not busy or excitedly looking at clothes, and I manage to get a ridiculously oversize brown box which doesn't look too girly or too plain after going into boulevard, popular and a gift shop. When I don't need boxes, there are so many of them to choose from, and when I friggin desperately need them they can hardly be found. I forgot about getting Oreos and rushed home because my friends said they would come and fetch me at 5pm and it was already 4pm and I still have not made my decision whether to join them and I still have to pack Bie's present nicely. So everything is done in a rush, skipped shower and packed present, cooked a packet of favourite instant noodles but did not finish and gave the rest to my brother because my friends said she is coming for me.

Sigh, I somehow know that I won't be spending a Christmas night with him though ( Mind you, my sixth sense sometimes tell me what's going to happen although not always accurate ). I tried my luck though and ask him if he wanted to join us for a movie. He said no, so it's OK la. PS do not persuade people unless she desperately has to or if she desperately wants something and doesnt care how the other person feels or consequences that will happen to that person, but PS care about how Bie will or might feel and what he wants to do , and since he already spent RM90 on Avatar that she rather him not go watch that ridiculous movie she watched, so PS did not plead. But then I still made him tell me when he reach home and reluctantly tell him my motives so that i could send the present over. I sent my present after the movie and he gave me his. Too bad I couldn't see his reaction. I really really hope he likes it. I don't know if God answered my prayers. I probably did not pray sincerely enough. I was actually very nervous the night before Christmas about giving him my present. He called after that telling me he took pictures of my present and posted it to facebook. He said a lot of something else but I can't hear most of it. Sorry Bie. Probably did mention about his feelings or something but I did not hear. Sigh. Friggin deaf ears.

Went to Isabella after giving him my present and commenting about his present while actually I'm very happy with the present and busy paisei-ing deep inside and subconsciously sniffing the tee shirt that he sprayed perfume or something on. I cincai cakap when I'm paisei ba. Ish.. Hate myself. There is only me Yhan and XY so XY invited Ya Cui and Nicholas over and we chatted about the past from Secondary to Primary about people we know or used to know and not heard about for a long time. Gossip about others. And updates about what happened to other friends and how they are doing. We moved outside when Isabella closes and chatted until we couldn't stand the mosquitoes we left. After sending Yhan home, Ya Cui said she felt hungry so we went to eat. Chatted for quite awhile and I reach home at almost 3, a broken record. If father is home I'm definately grounded. But somehow I don't feel like going home that night, that's why I agreed to go and eat. Haha.. Wanna be a naughty girl once in a while. Actually reluctant when Ya Cui says we should go cause she thinks that she and XY are boring me with talks on pubs and people and other things that I don't know.

One thing I hate most about plans is that things never went according to plan. Sigh. Bloody books on psychology asks you to visualize and things you visualize will come true. Mai siang sin la, pian lang eh! LOL. But still, at least this year I actually made something for someone important and I'm not spending Christmas alone with only mom or bro ( if father did not bring him along to celebrate ) at home this year. LOL. Something new for a change.

Bie Bie~ I miss you. Did not actually get a good look at you that night because I was nervous. Hope to see you real soon. Hope you feel the same too. LOVE YOU REAL LOTS!! xoxo